When it comes to mate selection, most people allow themselves to be guided by superficial factors such as physical appearance or outward trappings of success, such as flashy cars, and so on.
Despite the conscious rationalizations that most people come up with to explain their choice of mate, the reality is that mate choice is primarily driven by the unconscious mind. In fact, it’s said that 98% of the choices we make (the jobs we choose and the partners we select) is driven by the unconscious part of the psyche. Unfortunately, in the realm of mate selection, the unconscious mind is notorious for steering us wrong--especially if we are still saddled with Old Scars from childhood.
Unfortunately, because we choose partners who are limited and damaged in the exact same ways that our parents were, we never succeed in obtaining that Happy Ending. Instead we just keep banging our heads on the proverbial wall, fighting the same old fight, draining our lives away day by day, all the while getting nowhere.
To truly break free, you need to identify and heal your Old Scar. When your healing is finished, you will no longer be drawn to a “damaged goods” domestic partner. I have many ways to assist you in healing: the advice archives on this site are loaded with articles on this topic (see unfinished business, repetition compulsion, and Old Scars). In addition, my book, Till Death Do Us Part(Unless I Kill You First) presents my step-by-step plan for identifying and healing your Old Scars. Last but not least, my book Make Up Don’t Break Up shows you how to further nurture yourself and raise your self-esteem.
Once you’ve healed your Old Scar and raised what I call your Personal Net Worth, you will be ready to form a healthy relationship. At this point, you are ready to magnetize the right partner to you.
My free Create A Mate workbook will help you to do just that. This guide is based on all the factors that are related to compatibility, which includes Homogamy (or similarity in all the areas that matter most), Relationship Enhancing Communications, and strong Couple Identity. ( Read my article "How Can I Tell If We're Compatible?" for a full understanding of compatibility.)
To get your free copy of Create-A-Mate: Dr. Love’s Blueprint for Discovering Your Ideal Partner & Avoiding Incompatibility , all you have to do is sign up for my weekly newsletter. To get the newsletter click here . All my mailing lists strictly follow CAN-SPAM laws to ensure that you can unsubscribe at any time and your information is confidential.
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