Stop Making The #1 Mistake Of All Failed Relationships

Following a breakup, there's almost always a possibility of salvaging and healing the relationship.The problem that confronts anyone trying to repair a relationship is trying to figure out what to do differently so as to not end up repeating the same old patterns that lead to the same sad ending.The answer to this is much more basic and mundane: simply learn how to communicate more effectively with your partner.

The number one mistake that most fighting (and failed couples) make: they don't communicate their feelings and handle conflicts in a positive and constructive manner. They let their emotions take over and make unfair accusations.  Essentially the very definition of fighting: fighting = poor communication, it's as simple as that. Couples can have a conflict, but still be able to communicate positively in order to work through and resolve the disagreement. I explain at depth in all my books, including Make Up Don't Break Up, conflict and fighting are not the same thing.

At the root of all breakups is an unresolved conflict of some kind.When the fighting stops and the conflict is resolved, the relationship is healed and can resume in peace and harmony.

So, if want to get your ex back and to be the one who initiates saving the relationship, you have to be the one to drop your personal agenda and start listening. You can't continue to make you and your feelings, your explanations, or your gripes the main subject of discussion. Forget about how wronged you feel: instead, ask your partner how he or she feels wronged.

In my book Make Up, Don't Break Up: Dr. Love's 5 Step Plan For Reconciling With Your Ex, I provide step-by-step instructions on how to do this and how to approach your ex to discuss reconciliation.

In Till Death Do Us Part (Unless I Kill You First); A Step By Step Guide For Resolving Relationship Conflict, I devote an entire chapter to improving your listening skills, complete with examples, exercises, and specific communication techniques that will turn your negative fighting patterns into positive, relationship bonding experiences.

In my book Dr. Love's Couples' Guide to Surviving the Jolly Hollerdays, I give my powerful secret formula for declaring a permanent ceae- fire ...so you can finally turn your hollerdays into truly happy holidays.